I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
