One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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