what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
