Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
even my farts smell like vagina
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize