i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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