Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Randomize