And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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