Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
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