But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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