Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
You made out with two different species that night
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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