It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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