i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I FOUND THE LEGS
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
my liver is dry heaving
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize