Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
