what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
