We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a naked man in my car right now.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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