I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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