I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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