I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
