Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
How's work?
Spinning.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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