STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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