The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
