her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize