Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
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A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
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I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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