Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
zippers are such a cool invention
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
