the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i think i have herpe
just one?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
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So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
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For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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