Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
