Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
No subtext here. People are naked.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize