They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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