I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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