He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
