shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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