Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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