Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize