How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Randomize