I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize