No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize