I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
we're so committed to being not committed
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
