do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
