you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
