I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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