Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
