Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize