You're so nebulous sometimes
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
