Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
