So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Randomize
