I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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