Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
