Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
so that wasnt chicken after all
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You left your phone here
Wait...
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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