He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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