i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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