Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
